Oh no... I'm blogging again. Which could mean several things; 1) I got tired of my battered and scratched copy of "Barely Legal: Topless in Seattle", 2) I'm looking for an excuse to get to work late or 3) I'm piss drunk, and nobody wants to talk to me. Or it could be that I've just gotten the urge to sit down and type just for the sake of typing, meaningless meanderings be damned. Meaningless meanderings? Jeez on a trike. Talk about overstatement.

Anyways, if you're looking for a point, a punchline or some revelation to pop up somewhere along the line, I'd advise you to click the FILE menu on your toolbar, select NEW and punch in, er, whatever you usually punch in when you're looking for a point, a punchline or a revelation, 'cause you sure ain't gonna get one here, no siree, this is gonna be pointless, punchline-free and revelation-less all the way. And that's the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help me Gawd.

What? You say you've never read a blog without a point before? Well, lucky you! There's a first time for everything, and in your case, probably a last time too. If you're smart, you'll leave right now and move on to something more enlightening and less dangerous (wait... did I just rip off Lemony Snickett? Because nobody rips off Lemony Snickett and lives to tell the tale... at least, not without suffering a series of unfortunate events, and at least 13 hours of being inundated with the nightmarish visage of Jim Carrey as himself but dressed up as many other people, although I think the movie lasted just under 2 hours; those visions just stayed with me... what atrocious accents, what disgusting disguises, what terrible teeth...)

Speaking of teeth, I've just learned that I may be in a car accident in the 4th and 11th months of the Lunar calendar, and that one way to escape this dreaded fate is to visit the dentist and have my teeth cleaned. The theory is relatively simple; seeing as a trip to the dentist always leaves me short of at least 3 pints of blood, in the celestial scheme of things, this could offset the the possibility of losing that same amount of blood in a car accident, and therefore prevent such a motor mangling from ever occuring. Other ways of avoiding this include taking a blood test or donating blood. Too bad I don't get the menses; that would be a sure way of guaranteeing I NEVER get into any other sort of mishap that would cause me to lose blood. Thanks to my beloved girlfriend for the heads up. What, you thought I made that up? Don't mess with the Fates, man, all they need to do is snip off a little here and a little there and voila! your life in a bronze urn. Or solid oak coffin, whatever you fancy.

Well, anyway, enough nonsense for one night. Thank you for listening. No encores, but I'll be here till, er, whenever. Cheerio.